If you're looking for serious and thoughtful commentary on what will happen in the wake of Harriet Miers's withdrawal from Supreme Court consideration, check out this excellent post, by Lyle Denniston of SCOTUSblog. (Gavel bang: Howard Bashman.) If you're interested in learning about which women were previously eliminated as potential Supreme Court justices, en route to the ill-fated nomination of Harriet Miers -- information that could shed light on the identity of the next nominee -- read this column by John Fund. (Robe swish: David Frum.)
But if you're interested in completely unsubstantiated, utterly baseless rumors about who might be the next SCOTUS nominee, you've come to the right place! Here are a few of the more juicy rumors in circulation this morning:
1. At the White House, Karl Rove is meeting with President Bush, offering him this advice: "Mr. President, I have a great idea for whom you should nominate. He's one of the nation's best lawyers, with many years of dedicated government service under his belt. His integrity lies beyond question. His name is Patrick Fitzgerald..."
2. In Alexandria, Virginia, Judge J. Michael Luttig has asked his law clerks to conduct research into the world's leading experts in sex reassignment surgery. Judge Luttig was overheard making the following remarks to his clerks:
Once I get that sex change operation, I will be unstoppable as a Supreme Court nominee!!! This explains why, many years ago, I made the brilliant decision to go by my middle name. That choice will now allow me to be reincarnated after my surgery with ease -- as the Honorable Jennifer M. Luttig!!!
3. In Newark, New Jersey, Judge Samuel Alito has given his clerks a little genealogical research assignment: "Please find support for the following proposition: Alito is a common Hispanic surname."
7. In Washington, D.C., Maureen Mahoney is drafting the following letter to the U.S. Government Printing Office, which publishes U.S. Reports; West Publishing, which publishes the Supreme Court Reporter and runs Westlaw; and Lexis/Nexis:
To Whom It May Concern:
Please be advised that you have erroneously listed me as counsel of record in Grutter v. Bollinger, No. 02-241. This case was actually handled by Maureen M. Mahoney, of Kaw Valley Center, Inc., 759 Vermont Avenue, Kansas City, Kansas.
Please correct this error as soon as possible. Thank you for your time and immediate attention to this matter.
Maureen Mahoney, Esq.
If you have any legitimate, more substantiated rumors about the identity of who will be replacing Harriet Miers as President Bush's Supreme Court nominee, please email Article III Groupie. Muchas gracias!